This is My Success Story.

Tell me…what is Success to you? In this very moment as you are reading this statement, what does Success look like for you? Is it driving a luxury car? Is it owning a house with 12 bedrooms? Or is it being able to afford a lifestyle that you desire? Please take a moment to think about your answer.

For the longest time, I have felt like I have been holding myself back. Every single time that I felt like I have something I really wanted to say, I would run my thoughts and ideas through one single filter, “What would the designers and developers in my community think?”, “Am I sounding too arrogant? Proud?”, “Should I maybe make myself sound a little modest instead? Maybe they will find it more acceptable?”

What a load of bull.

Here’s what I really wanted to say and I believe it is time that I said it all, #unfiltered.

This is My Story. And You have been Warned.

I started my career as a software developer and as some of you have read before, I discovered my early interests and passion in UX and front-end development. That is how all of this began. For years, I have in separate instances tried to share/tell my story, but for some reason I could never quite figured out, my stories always felt one sided. That’s because it is/was. Every single time that I tried to tell it, I would also try to hide a version of that story, thus hoping that it might appeal to a certain group of target audience, but the truth is, it was never really the whole TRUTH.

So, today, I am going to tell you the story of how I went from being a software developer into one of the top central voices of the UX industry. Not just nationally, or regionally, but on the global stage.

👨‍💻 From an Outcast/Outsider, to an Insight Insider

For almost 20 years since the day that I’ve made my early interests known, I’ve been treated like an outcast, an outsider from the design industry because to them, I was just this “software development” guy. And because of my background and unique perspective, most of my views and beliefs were also considered to be crazy and insanely radical. I’m like that guy in a movie, standing outside the hotel lobby holding up a sign and screaming about my beliefs and views, but everyone else thought I’m just crazy insane dude. Someone that they didn’t have to take seriously. Well, not anymore. Not after receiving the kind of validation and recognition that I’ve receive today from UX Collective, one of the most important online resource locations for the UX design community. Yes guys, I have been officially featured as one of the top central voices in this industry. It’s already happened. Accept it or deal with it.

👨‍💻 From Doing Things My Way, to Finally Leading the Way

Have you ever felt what it is like to be treated like an outsider or outcast from a group or community? Do you remember what it feels like? I know I do. Vividly. I remember what it felt like when I had an idea of how to better improve the way we design and build websites long before we ever had smartphones, and back then, my superiors and even those in the design community would say that I am crazy. They would sometimes say things like, “But nobody has ever done it that way before. That is crazy. We certainly won’t try it. If you want to do it, go ahead. It is your choice.”

Here’s my first TRUTH BOMB 💣:

Many of those designers and developers that told me that my way/method was insane and that they would never try it (or work with me on a project), I know it is because they were afraid that I might fail, and as a result, it would ruin their own reputations.

But what they also didn’t realize is that as risky as it was for me to try new ways of doing things, they also often panned out. Now, I am not going to sit here and tell you that it was always successful. That would be an outright lie. Yes, there have been moments where my risks didn’t pan out. And yes, I did wonder to myself in those moments, were they right to say that about me? But here is the other TRUTH BOMB 💣:

In ALL of the times that I was right about the risk I took, I also ended up breaking a new industry record as a freelancer. I ended up with a project result that was far better than what anyone else had done at that point in time. In fact, all the times I’ve managed to succeed at trying something new, I would be able to hold that record for at least a considerable length of time. I call that sustainable success.

And now, finally AFTER NEARLY 20 YEARS…, now the industry of designers and front-end engineers are finally getting to see that well, turns out, I was mostly right all along. Look, I get it, maybe I seem like an untested guy, with an untested theory and idea coming to you. The least you could’ve done was hear me out and give me due consideration. Oh well, what’s done is done. Let’s move on. 😏

👨‍💻 From Being Told “You don’t belong”, to Becoming a Central Voice

Even though those might not have been the exact words that I’ve received over the years, they all sounded pretty much the same. Every time I went to a meet up group, or attended an event with other designers present, or even online; I would have these honestly hurtful personal encounters where designers, or even some that consider themselves to be “leaders in the industry” *roll eyes*, would have the guts to tell me, “Hey look, you are just a software developer. I have look at your work history. Please don’t call yourself a UX thought leader. Please go back to what you are supposed to be doing.”

Man…WTF!! I mean…LITERALLY DUDE…WTF! 🤬

Who the hell do you think you are to say that to me. You might not know me very well, and you most certainly haven’t been in my shoes or hear my story, who gave you the right to tell me that I didn’t belong.

Honestly, I am unapologetic about saying this right now, I really hope he [one of them] sees my LinkedIn post and I hope he sees my blog post. I hope he realizes that he ought to be eating his words right now.

Found My Voice, but Was Afraid to Use It

But here’s the other truth. Up until this point in my career, I had just finally learned and discovered that I had a voice. Maybe it wasn’t prominent in any way, but I was beginning to realize that I might actually have something valuable to share. But instead of encouraging my voice and giving me a chance to share what I have learned, I was constantly shutdown by those that have claimed to be leaders of the industry.

Shame on you.

Do you know what it really means to be a leader in the industry? It is about giving others a voice even when they feel like they couldn’t hear themselves. It is about stepping aside so that you can give them a chance in the limelight (whether they deserve it or not). Being a design leader is about lifting up the work and achievements of the other designers around us.

When was the last time that you’ve uplifted another designer’s or front-end developer’s work instead of your own?

👨‍💻 From Insanely Radical, to Radical Necessity

Finally, I am going to close with this final truth.

We often like to judge others because of their differences (radical or not) and we think that it makes us look and sound better. It doesn’t. It only made you look like an idiot who’s unable, or unwilling to accept or consider the perspectives and ideas of someone else even when it challenges your own narrative of what you think you already know or understand about the industry.

I know what it is like to listen to a crazy sounding idea for the first time. Trust me, I have been living inside my head for so long, I feel like I’m going nuts some times. But here’s what I have learned from learning to listening to others…really listen, and then giving them a due consideration before telling them what I thought about their ideas. They often walk away from the session feeling like their ideas (valid or not) mattered. And that gave them the confidence that they needed to keep exploring, to keep trying and to keep improving.

When we start to judge others that have a different view point from ourselves, we are essentially closing the door on ourselves to actually, and potentially learn something incredible from others. Speaking as someone that has mentored others, I have listened to many different kinds of ideas, some may be a little reserved (maybe because what they needed was a little self-belief that their ideas might actually work); other times, they might have needed someone to tell them constructively that their ideas is doable, but they might want to break it down into stages.

No matter how crazy, or otherworldly an idea might sound to you today, never ever dismiss it as useless, or crazy. It might seem crazy today, but one day, those crazy radical ideas might just be something that you find yourself needing.

Thank You UX Collective for this Long-Awaited Recognition & Validation

I want to first give an incredible shoutout to Dan Maccarone and the UX Collective team for this incredibly well-crafted article, and yes, for the honor of being featured as a voice in the UX industry. As I have told him private in our PMs, I will say the same here, it is not a small thing for me because it really isn’t. Not when you have considered everything else that I had to overcome to finally make it this far.

When I was finally on my way home last night, I had practically reached a point of exhaustion in my journey that I never felt before. I literally felt like I was going to fall apart and buckle under the weight of all my financial commitments and that feeling of, “why am I still feeling like I’m all alone in this?”

It was one of the heaviest things I ever had to carry. And so, I said a prayer, and I asked God not to let me fall apart. Not right now. Not when I have these responsibilities depending on me. And I said those words, “God, please give me a sign, if not something big, give me something UNDENIABLE.”

So, when I finally read the article this morning, it was more than a sign from God. It was a NEON SIGN that has showed me that I am already right where I needed to be. I’m already here. Not in the sense that I’ve arrived at some kind of destination. No. It’s is the fact that I have finally become the person that I was always meant to be. And I no longer have to feel like I have to keep proving myself anymore.

This…IS MY SUCCESS STORY.

P.S. And yes, that featured image, is literally my first official victory meal of my career. It tasted so damn good I scooped up every last bit of cabonara sauce. I literally felt like I died and went to heaven! Thanks to the guy working the counter of the Tenderbest stall for giving me the extra two slices of Garlic bread! They tasted so out of the world awesome! Maybe its just my sweet victory today that finally made everything feel a million times better!