⁶ not with eyeservice, as men-pleasers, but as bondservants of Christ, doing the will of God from the heart, ⁷ with goodwill doing service, as to the Lord, and not to men, ⁸ knowing that whatever good anyone does, he will receive the same from the Lord, whether he is a slave or free.

Ephesians 6:6-8 [NKJV]

Morning guys, I know by the time that you are reading this post, it could be a different time of the day for you. Regardless, I wanted to greet you and I truly hope that your Saturday has been kind to you so far. As I begin my day, I wanted to take this moment to share my daily bread reflections with you. At the very same time, I also want to be really authentic about my own struggles lately.

Starting with Gratitude & Appreciation

Before I get into the most authentic parts of my recent personal experiences, I want to start my daily bread by reflecting on my deepest gratitude and appreciation. I am so grateful that I have this current job. It is not just a job to me. It is also a career milestone for me. This is a chance for me to move out of my own comfort zone and straight into the growth zone. I am grateful that after years of financial instability, temporary jobs and odd gigs, I have finally landed a job where I am finally happy. It is the kind of job that provides me with a sense of purpose. It has been a really long while since I’ve felt appreciated, valued and a sense of belonging. After almost two decades of job hopping, I genuinely believe that I’ve found a place where I can remain and stay for the long term. And I’m referring to that in years. For the first time in my entire career, I feel like God has place me in a company where I could potentially make an impact.

I am also very grateful for the recent introduction of the SkillsFuture SG Level-Up Programme. This is a local SG program that the government has created a number of years ago. But this year, it is different because they’ve included a S$4,000 credit for those mid-career folks (40 and above) like myself. This on top of the previous S$550 credits that I have not touched yet. This programme was introduced around the very same time when I landed my current job. The timing is clearly epic. For me, it felt like God was showing me a sign, the next step that I should be taking. The bible reminds that it is always God who directs our steps (in spite of our best-laid plans). And we need to learn to trust Him. He always knows what is best for us. So, I sent out that email in May and I continued to follow through with the whole application process. Another thing that I am super grateful for is the fact that I am a Singaporean. Because of that simple fact, I am also entitled to greater subsidies when applying to schools/courses at local institutions. Thanks to that, my overall school fees was reduced down to the remainder amount of just S$376.05. And to my surprise, my SSG credits was able to fully cover for that remainder amount. It meant that I didn’t have to pay for the part-time specialist diploma from my own pocket. I am so grateful that I have this current opportunity to go back to school after over two decades of leaving school, and that everything has been “fully paid for”. I like to think that this is one of those ways where God will provide for us (by giving us a way/solution) to meet the challenge/opportunity.

Scaling my Next Mountain ⛰

Now, we have finally come to the part of my daily reflections where I want to share with you about the things that I’ve been experiencing in the weeks since taking on this new career opportunity as well as the start of my part-time studies. In many ways, when I face what is currently ahead of me right now, I can’t deny that I’m facing one of the greatest challenges so far. It is different for sure. It is not the same as the negative (suffering and personal sacrifices) challenges that I had to face and overcome in recent years. This is a positive kind of challenge. It is the kind of challenge that will push me and give me the opportunity to become better by overcoming it. That said, let me be real with you for a moment. As I am still going through this personal experience, I will say that I’ve begun to experience those early signs of burnout. It doesn’t meant that my motivation has been affected. Well, maybe slightly. But, for the most part, my motivation to do well is very much still there. The one thing that I have been experiencing lately is a slightly drop in focus and self-discpline. When it comes to my work, I’ve been struggling with trying to remain focused. Every single day, everywhere I go, I would look around and see all these potential distractions. Temptations and urges that are threatening to take my focus away from what I ought to be doing, my work. In the past two weeks alone, I’ve already noticed myself losing my focus and concentration on a few different instances.

To me, I’ve recognized that this is what I would describe as a “stretching” moment. Think of it like a piece of metal that is under-going immense stress to stretch it and to form it into a particular shape. Better yet, think of it like a diamond before it even becomes that. Before it can become the most prized gemstones on earth, it is first just graphite. There is nothing really special or unique about it. The earth has plenty of it. But it is when graphite is subjected to nearly 50,000 the pressure of the earth that it starts to become a diamond. In much the same way, as I look at this phase of my own journey and growth, I am being reminded that the stress and pressure that I am facing and dealing with today is very much the same. It is a way to bring out the best in me (in time to come).

Last night aka this morning, as I was laying on my bed before falling asleep, I took a quick moment to pray to God. I ask Him for greater self-discipline if I was lacking discipline. I also asked Him for more focus if that is what I lacked. And for everything else that I lack in my life right now, I asked Him for more of it. And to have more of everything that I lack, I need more of Him in my life. As I get ready to begin my work for today, I will continue to pray inside my heart. I will continue to have faith and believe that in Him, I will be able to find an abundance for everything that I am currently lacking in my life.

Personal Prayer for Today

Dear Heavenly Father,

I come before You this morning. I’m still feeling slightly tired after being so distracted last night and I ended up watching movies till nearly 3am in the morning. But as I come before You this morning, I am reminded that I can lean on You for everything that I need. Thank You for helping me to recognize I’ve been experiencing the early signs of burn out. I am thankful to You for helping me to see it before things progress even further. At least, by being able to identify it sooner, we will be able to deal with it sooner rather than later. Thank You for helping me to see that.

Thank You also for giving me a good rest, even though I only had roughly 5.5 hours of it. As I come before You today, I am praying and asking You for more strength. I am asking You for renewed energy. I am asking You for a renewed focus as I continue to face the challenge of this new career opportunity as well as my part-time studies. I know that this weekend will be tough because I have to deal with both my work as well as my group assignment. So bless me Lord. Help me. Help me, not just to get through this period of my life, but also to thrive. Help me to succeed Lord. I know that I cannot do it with my own strength. But with You, I know we can accomplish anything.

So I vow to give You all of the praise and all the glory. In Jesus’ name I pray.

Amen.