²⁵ Let your eyes look straight ahead,
And your eyelids look right before you.
²⁶ Ponder the path of your feet,
And let all your ways be established.
²⁷ Do not turn to the right or the left;
Remove your foot from evil.

Proverbs 4:25-27 [NKJV]

I know that this topic might seem a little too basic. It’s like trying to talk about the fundamentals. To some people, it’s like speaking about something that’s implicit. It’s something that we are all so familiar with. We have all been taught and train since young that we need to be able to concentrate and focus on something that we want to do if we want to be successful in it. And yet, I have realized that as I got older, it’s actually not always that easy or simple. As we get older, and we begin to work, and we begin to be able to afford things in our lives; that is when we begin to really want certain things. We want that tech gadget, that branded bag, that new watch, that car, that dress/shirt. Whatever it might be, we are currently living in a world where we are constantly being bombarded by marketing advertisements about the things that we sometimes wish we could have, but sometimes, might not have the means for it. And even if we could afford it, it really isn’t something that we really need in our lives.

Those are just the material possessions that sometimes takes our focus away from the stuff that truly mattered more. But I don’t want to stop there. I also want to talk about the more intangible things. Things that we chase after in life but aren’t important either – stuff like constantly living just to please others, or trying to fit in (but in doing so, we compromise on our values, principles and integrity). There are so many examples of things we could be chasing in our lives that aren’t important. And they would only serve to take our focus away from what really matters – God and becoming better human beings.

Finding Your Purpose, or “Ikigai”

I have always been someone who shares a deep seeded need to find and discover my purpose and meaning in life. This goes way way back to the days when I was only a 15 year old teenager. That was the very first time I ever tried to ask the question, “What is my purpose here on earth?” I wasn’t a believer/Christian yet, so my next question was, “Why did my parents bring into this world?”

You see, growing up, I’ve always struggled with chronic anxiety disorders. Much of it has been a result of trying to fit in, and trying to please others. That resulted in me losing my own sense of self. When I am with different groups of people, I would often say and do very different things. I was never the same person. And one of those groups of people also included my parents. I found it very difficult to be myself in front of them, even to this very day.

So, at the age of 15, going 16, I already start having that idea embedded in my mind and my heart. But I was still too young then, and honestly, I was also facing a lot of peer pressure, pressure from the education system, and the societal & cultural norms. Worse of all, I was also facing a lot of pressure at home. So as much as I wanted to figure out what it means to find meaning in my life, I would continue to lead a life of constantly pleasing others until I was in my early- to mid-30s.

Benefits of Finding Your Purpose/Meaning in Life

I love the word “ikigai”, which is a Japanese term for that blends two words: “iki” meaning “to live,” and “gai” meaning “reason,” which translates to “a reason to live.” It’s a concept that encourages people to discover what truly matters to them and to live a life filled with purpose and joy.

After spending the last 9 years of my life giving up all the personal comforts and safety, I am happy to say that I have not only discovered my purpose and meaning in life, but I am actually able to finally start living in it (fulfilling this calling in my life).

Now, I know that people often think about having a purpose or calling in life as something that is singular. Like there should only be one single point of purpose/calling in our lives. I beg to differ. I think as individuals, God has made us all different. For some of us, yes, it is possible that we would find just one purpose/calling in our lives. But I also believe that it is possible for us to have multiple callings/purposes in life. It’s the few things in our lives that truly gives us meaning and purpose. And even people who may only have one singular focus at a time, there is always a good chance that they might discover a different calling/purpose at a much later time in their lives. So, that should help to dispel the belief that when it comes to having a purpose/calling in life, it should only be just one thing.

Finding Purpose/Meaning Helps Us Focus on What Matters

“Put simply, now, I actually have more focus and energy left for doing the things that will really help further my progress where my purpose/calling is concerned”

This means being able to prioritize our daily lives, the activities and stuff that we want to spend/invest our time on. When you learn to accept that we only have effectively a limited number of hours in a day, then we will start to figure out that we can’t give our time to so many things. Once we have that in our mindset, it becomes much easier to filter out all the non-essential distractions and focus on the things that are essential to fulfilling our purpose/calling in life.

I have discovered that ever since I have discovered my purpose and calling in life, it has become so much easier to stay focused on what I want to do/achieve. Also, I realized over the years that I am no longer weighed down by all the other non-essential stuff/activities. Put simply, now, I actually have more focus and energy left for doing the things that will really help further my progress where my purpose/calling is concerned.

Rediscovering my long-lost Grit and Resilience

Remember how I shared that for most of my life until my 30s, I had been living a life of trying to please others, of trying to fit in. It is in the process of living that way that led me to losing my sense of self. By the time I was in my mid-30s, I had absolutely no clear idea of who I really am on the inside. Away from all the different masks that I had been wearing for so long. It took me years, but I would eventually be able to rediscover who I am (away from everyone else, and what the society or culture expects me to be). I discovered that I was actually someone that’s born with a natural grit and resilience. Ever since I was a very young child, I already had the determination and grit that wasn’t very normal for most children. While I was a chubby kid, and I wasn’t always the smartest in the classroom, I was always the one who would never give up. I was constantly determined to keep trying and trying, long after I have failed multiple times. I just wouldn’t quit (even after everyone else has gone home).

“I do believe that these are qualities can also be nurtured as we go through life.”

But that does not mean that qualities like grit and resilience are natural-born qualities. I do believe that these are qualities can also be nurtured as we go through life. Sure, yes, some people are naturally more resilient than others. But even for folks like us, we can lose it if we do not keep using it, to keep practicing it in our daily lives. It’s not that it goes away, we just forget that it’s there. Have you ever stop using something in the house for a long time and eventually you just forgot that it was even there? That is what it is like for me.

Finding my purpose and meaning is life was one of the most major reasons why I started to rebuild (and to keep building up) my grit and resilience. This whole entire process did take me many years. But I did it. There were multiple times on this journey where I came really close to giving up, or thought about the idea of walking away. But I decided that I had already invested so much of my life into this pursuit, I’ve endured way too much shit to walk away now. And so I would just keep going.

Here’s what I’ve realized in hindsight, having a purpose/calling in my life really did provide a major boost to my grit and resilience. Constantly being reminded of my purpose and calling made me not want to give up because I know what the price/cost would be if I did.

When I think about the work that I get to do today because of the recent career opportunity that I had just secured, and how this career opportunity is a major step in the right direction towards fulfilling and walking in the path of my purpose/calling, I know I am extremely grateful for the grit and perseverance not to give up.

“Constantly being reminded of my purpose and calling made me not want to give up because I know what the price/cost would be if I did.”

Personal Prayer for Today

Dear Heavenly Father,

Thank You for speaking to me this morning through Your word. Thank you for the reminder of what it is so important that we are focused and not become distracted by the things of this world that honestly doesn’t really help us lead a more fulfilling life, or to become better people towards one another.

Today, I feel reminded that I had spent a major part of my life chasing after all those things – the things that often distracted me away from the things that shouldn’t mattered. As tough and difficult as it has been for the last few years, in hindsight, I’ve come to appreciate the struggles and challenging times because they have allowed me to test my own grit and resilience as a human being. I suppose the fact that I’ve made it to this milestone in my career/life, it must mean that I survived and passed the test.

I feel blessed in a way I suppose. Because of my own struggles and experiences, I know have the experiences and lessons that I could share with others. I am grateful that You have given me TWO areas of purposes and calling in my life. The first one is a professional one – in Product Design, UX and Front-end Development. The second one is in personal development (also slightly spiritual-leaning one) – to help others lead their own purpose-driven life. Though I’m not quite sure how to go about the second one yet. I just know that I sense this deep burning conviction inside me to want to help others discover their own “ikigai”.

Well, no matter, I will continue to trust that You will guide me and give me the directions on how to go forward in all the things that I need to do (all things that are within Your will).

Finally, Father God, I want to thank You for blessing me with this laser-like focus that I have today. A focus that I never had in the past, and now I can put it to work in my life every single day. I ask that You will continue to shower Your grace and favor upon me as I continue to make the best of every single day of my life.

I pray and ask all of this in Jesus’ mighty name.

Amen.